and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
