There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
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