Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
