i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Randomize
