you guys were way drunker than both of me
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Randomize
