so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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