If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
