Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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