So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
Randomize
