You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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