I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
