Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
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