so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
i need to get drunk because i'm an angry sober
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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