We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
