I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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