I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Randomize
