you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
