OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize
