he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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