You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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