My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
Randomize
