It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Randomize
