How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
that's an acceptable place to lick
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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