At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
John Mayer's mother should have swallowed him when she had the chance.
As in blowjob or cannibalism?
I was thinking blowjob, but either would've been a better idea than giving him a record deal.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
It's official drugs can't kill me
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
