I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize