i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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