He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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