There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
