he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize