If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Mom said you looked used
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
