I'm lost and stupid without you.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
