I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
