Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
