no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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