He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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