she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
