No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
