I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
