we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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