You smell like stripper and shame
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Video footage says last night I reincarnated as stripper Shania Twain... Man, I feel like a (slutty) woman.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
