The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
By the end of the first quarter he was so hammered he was pouring beer into the crockpot with the miniature hot dogs and BBQ sauce saying he loved the supper bowl and he loves taking mini weinies to the face
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
