Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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