what day is it and did you see me today?
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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