So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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