Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
