Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Randomize
