Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
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