I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Randomize