it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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