bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
