as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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